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The hot dog is a polarizing vessel across the United States.
One of the last times I was back home in Chicago was for a Fourth of July meal featuring juicy smashburgers, succulent chicken thighs, and a hot dog bar with all the accoutrements a Chicagoan could want.
A red and white checkered tablecloth covered a table filled with dogs, poppy seed rolls, three kinds of mustards, fresh tomatoes, neon sweet relish, chopped onions, pickle spears, sport peppers and shakers of celery salt.
Everyone knows I love spreads (get it?).
This Friday at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway, the Chi Dog (Midwest) is one of six Wienermobiles set to compete in the second annual Oscar Mayer Wienie 500. It joins the New York Dog (East), Chili Dog (South), Seattle Dog (Northwest), last year’s winner Slaw Dog (Southeast) and new entrant via fan vote, Corn Dog.
Race day coverage begins at 2 p.m. ET on FOX and FOX One.
One of my jobs in this region is to handicap sporting events, analyze the odds and give you an informed idea on what to bet. The fact is that no American bookmaker bets on the Wienie 500.
For what?
“Is this a serious question?” Circa Sports Director of Operations Jeff Benson texted me earlier this week. “It’s not video game approved. You know that.”
I did I know, but Benson’s reaction was worth asking.
So we can’t bet on it, but I still have a sausage in the race. And you will too. Chances are you’re looking for the hot dog that will bring back your favorite childhood memories. Nostalgia tends to hit the mark at events like this.
If you lathered yours with brown mustard and sauerkraut, you’ll attract the New York Dog. If you’ve been to chili or chili cheese, you know the drill. If you put cream cheese or coleslaw on your dog like a monster, God bless you.
We try not to judge here.
Last year, Slaw Dog was second going into the final turn before chasing down Chi Dog with speeds of nearly 70 miles per hour to take the checkered flag.
“I’m all-in on college baseball right now,” one anonymous bettor told me when asked about this year’s race. “But I like a good villain. Give me the Slaw Dog to fend him off. That will set up the hat-trick for next year.”
Choose your sausage wisely.
I’m going to Chi Dog to get revenge. And you?
